Struggle Well: Thriving in the Aftermath of Trauma

"Struggle Well" is a breakthrough book that deals honestly with the needs of men and women who have been deeply impacted by war and other traumatic events. Pills, unsolicited and thoughtless advice and ill conceived "treatments" have done little to address the deep needs of warriors and first responders. During my time in service during Vietnam I had many clients who struggled to replace horrible memories with good ones, to build a new reality that didn't deny what they'd been through but they managed to gradually "move on". As I stayed involved over the years I noted that this was getting harder for returning veterans, Something had changed, perhaps the 24/7 nature of war in a combat zone is what's different - certainly deployments are longer and more frequent. Whatever the reason I witnessed countless warriors come back only to be trapped in a diagnosis that typecast them and a VA system that medicated them into severe addictions. What Ken has created at Boulder Crest and what he now lays out in "Struggle Well" is by far the best effort currently underway. The approach isn't new, it builds on deep truths. Suffering sucks, but it can be ennobling. How we respond to trauma of every kind is a choice - our final freedom. This book lays out a practical way how to, quoting Dusty's colorful phrase, "un-f*** yourself". We have to do the work and it can't be done if we have no hope. While reading the opening chapters the scripture from Jeremiah 29:11 - "For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." kept running through my head. This is the message we need to hear. I'm grateful that Ken and Josh tell it like it is in their new book. There's no BS between these covers, no therapeutic gobbledygook and no magic. But there is hope and a roadmap that we all can follow.

First, this sounds like it was written by a kid. It’s terrible, and an immature style that dumbs down everything. I'm not exagerrating by saying this book essentially says all your issues are childhood issues. That means regardless of any massive trauma you encounter in adulthood, guess what?!?! It’s really still just childhood issues. I agree, we all carry baggage from childhood, and trauma from childhood. However, that does NOT give reason to ignore and tout that as the end all be all. This ignores SO much and then gives people with PTSD who are abusive to those around them and have caused massive trauma through that abuse to say, “it wasn’t me, it’s just your own childhood trauma.” Blame shifting, gaslighting, and zero accountability. This book excuses this by giving them more ways to abuse. Further, for veterans who have been dealing with maybe both, It doesn’t give much validity to the latter combat trauma. I feel as though, it wouldn't seem all that validating for a combat veteran who was haunted and plagued by trauma from the wars to be told; it't not the wars, it's your childhood. Obviously at some point, we all need to dig deeper and and keep unfolding the layers. However, addressing all the sources of trauma are important. A rape victim is not traumatized by childhood trauma. You get my drift. Further it discusses shame and what it does to people, and to people who grow up in homes riddled with that, and the affects of that when they come into the service. However at another point it gives a nod to the whole first phase of training; which is basically a complete shame based undoing of a person. A complete mental mind f$&@ and everyone knows that. So, to say coming from an abusive childhood sets you up for trauma, but the military being emotionally and mentally abusive is a great thing is absurd. This book tells men to go over their family trees and stop the cycle so their children aren’t further results of it??? Some of these men have already perpetuated this on their kids for decades and there is no division on that. Some men have been abusive toward their families and they don’t address fixing that. It’s all this hi five, pat on the back, congrats book. But not really much more. Further, it puts these concentric circles around what they should be focusing on and giving back to. And families are barely more than themselves. Clearly, again, not someone who lived a life with a veteran. They have a serious problem EVER truly seeing and appreciating their families. It talks immensely about giving to community, doing outreach, etc. barely brushes on fixing things at home and doesn’t acknowledge or even understand how much damage most homes have already suffered and dealt with. One of my favorite parts is where it oversimplifies alcoholism, affairs, and other toxic behaviors perpetuated by men stuck in trauma, supposedly AfTER they went through addressing disclosure and MOS. They still cycle in the shame and abuse. But, guess what?!?! It’s ok! Don’t be too hard on yourself. Just keep going. It completely ignores the devastation and damage that is left in the wake of these cycles. It is truly a pathetic, elementary, book written to bolster the ego and boost the spirit of people who have hurt others. Do some real reading and research and dive MUCH deeper if you want to truly be a better person and help the people you have hurt too. This felt like a book written for people who can't face what they have done to people and their lives.

A critic said this book is nothing but a “self-help book disguised as a trauma therapy book”. You damned right. I needed to do some self-help. After 1 and 1/2 years of 1-2 x a week therapy for PTSD that did nothing, and at times made it worse, I sought another way through research. Traditional therapy has proven to be ineffectual for Military and First Responders. Medication only dulls the feelings. The symptoms do not go away. I found the research of Dr. Richard Tedeschi and Dr. Bret Moore who recommended this book. Struggle Well put into words a clear and concise plan of action for Post Traumatic Growth. I did not need to “deal with it” but needed to acknowledge it, move through it and, most importantly, grow from it. I am a whole person with a life story, not just a single, or in my case cumulative, experience. Ken and Josh successfully organize and articulate a comprehensive approach to embrace the struggle for anyone dealing with PTSD. I highly recommend it for those that have not found the help they need with traditional therapy and drugs. This work saved my life.

An excellent book. I have just finished reading it, cover to cover. It has given me some pointers, some of which I am already using. Helping me through my current struggles. I will be returning to the book to read parts as I need them, and will definitely be reading the whole book over and over. I thoroughly recommend reading this, whether your struggles are minor or more complex and involved.

This explains a unique and potentially life changing model for "post traumatic growth", an essential for mental health practitioners and military charities. And U love the metaphors..they bring the model to life and make it easy to understand. Congratulations Ken and Josh on a stunning read

Easy read practical advice.