Jessica Kingsley Publishers I'm Not Upside Down, Downside Up: a Boring Book About PDA

This book is 64 pages with large print and illustrations. (I thought it was for adults when I bought it and expected a full 200+ page book, so $15 feels overpriced to me.) Based on the format, the audience might be kids with PDA . It's a tween girl with PDA narrating several difficult interactions with her internal reasoning. My PDA son is 9, so the child's perspective may end up being helpful for me. I can see myself potentially rereading it for validation of how difficult PDA really is to parent!! My son really does say no JUST because I asked! He really does escalate his harmful behaviors when he doesn't get what he wants! I'm not crazy. I can also see myself potentially rereading it for the reminder that he didn't choose to be this way, either, and that these are nervous system panic attack meltdowns, not him throwing a fit intentionally, that it's miserable for him, too.Examples"She kept asking me, and I kept saying no, even though inside I was angry with myself and really wanted to do it.""When I'm having a meltdown it's like it's not even me doing it." "This behavior has nothing to do with me being rude but is the result of a panic attack." "Even when I'm really stressed out and I'm reaching my limit they mistakenly believe that I am choosing to behave badly.It shows her escalating her behaviors when she doesn't get what she wants (saying no to yelling to throwing) a few times, which I absolutely see in my son.

I highly recommend this book for both PDA’ers and for people in their lives. It ever so eloquently describes the goings on in a PDA’ers brain (at least it did mine) providing validation after years of “WTF!” It also provides those sharing their life with a PDA’er a pretty accurate picture of what goes on behind our puzzling, frustrating, weird, etc behaviour. I read it cover to cover within hours of getting it. Thank you for this lovely book.

This is a story of a PDA girl and very cleverly depicts situations within the story line of a situation at home, at school, when plans have changed and a meltdown. It is a quick read and is not an in-depth read on what PDA is from a traits, and strategies point of view, but oh so more impactful being written from the child’s perspective. Our 8yr old is suspected to be autistic with a PDA profile as well as dyspraxia. After I read the book, I sat and read it to her. Some pretty blunt bits in it, but over and over again she said ‘this girl is just like me’ or ‘that’s how I feel’. I’m hoping it’ll increase her insight into why she has her meltdowns or behaves the way she does.Thank you for helping me to see inside my precious girl’s mind a little more.

I bought this book for my 9yo and feel as though it's a bit leading in the direction of making mean words and actions ok. Even though my child is autistic and PDA, I still make them accountable for misbehaviour. I didn't end up giving them this book as I felt it wasn't appropriate for a child still learning how to regulate and that lashing out isn't ok. It is a good book and an older person who has developed those skills may find it more relatable.

Our son (age 9) is diagnosed with PDA, and we are always looking for resources to help him to understand that he is not alone, to understand the strengths and challenges that come along with PDA - and to find his way + connections with others in the PDA community. I bought the book with the intention of giving the book to him, or reading together. While I do understand that in the storyline there are lots of entry points to conversations about the character in the book who navigates various challenges - the character is featured acting violently towards her parent at the slightest infraction. For this reason, I decided against sharing this with my son. At times, the book is pretty upsetting - while the character (and many kids) with PDA do have serious regulation issues, and can at times be so dysregulated that they end up lashing out or losing impulse control or even hurting another person due to their own frustrations - it seems the character in the book does this again and again. Although the character expresses remorse at the end of the book and the parent is SO understanding, I don't want my son to think he's pre-disposed to act this way (as it is extremely rare that he does.. ). If the book had spent slightly more time talking in simple terms about the WHY the child was lashing out, or breaking down a bit more what the character's body feels like before this happens, or what leads to this reaction, i feel like it could have been more instructive. When my son needs the most help and support is when he is dysregulated.. and this is what the mother in the book does by stepping up to support her child at these crisis points - and this is what I and my family do as well. In the end, I think this is not the right tool to help my son understand himself and the PDA community better until he is at least quite a bit older. All this said, I have been and remain a huge fan of Harry Thompson, and am always grateful for the support, transparency and generosity in which he shares his experience with the world - to ensure the PDA community is better understood.